I've got a message about an important topic
for y'all today.
I'm still in New York after leading an Art
of Attraction workshop last weekend.
I was going to take a break from writing, but
I got this letter and had to answer.
He's asking the question we ALL ask when we
really start to take this seriously.
===
"hi lance
i love your products - but you dont explain
how to mend a broken
heart - i let her get under my skin and 2
years later it stopped and ive hit
a brick wall - there was no one worse then me
to hit on a women i had
natural talents - god i miss her but i have
my dignity - thats all i have
left -- sorry go on lance -- regards
- Phil"
===
Phil,
First of all buddy, you should that you are
NOT alone.
I started in this whole line of business
because I was broken-hearted.
My friends who work with me, my coaches, all
came to me to learn after having that one
heartbreak to many. Hell, the whole point of
the movie "Hitch" is that the big stud dating
expert is really just trying to cover the
pain of a distant, but still bleeding,
heartbreak.
There's a way to live your life so that you
CAN and DO recover from breakups. You can
still have great girlfriends and great
relationships, but not feel like she broke
your legs when it's over.
I'll tell you the truth, man. One of the
things no one talks about when it comes to
pickup and dating is the fact that almost all
relationships are going to end.
Yeah, you need to know how to get things
started, but you also need to know how to end
them right.
And the most important thing is that you know
how to take care of yourself. See, girls know
to build up support systems after a breakup.
They go out with friends. They keep busy.
They start flirting again. They mourn, but
then move on.
Men try to keep it quiet and keep a tight lid
on it. We hide in our caves and lick our
wounds like the lone wolf running free from
the pack (and even Chaz Michael Michaels
learns the lone wolf can't run alone
forever).
We suffer more because we take this bizarre
pride in our suffering. We keep the letters,
we keep the photos. We look at them and
replay the good times, and edit out the nasty
fights and the breakfasts of no eye contact
and awkward conversation.
We forget that she didn't really make us
happy.
So I'm giving you a Six-Step plan today,
Phil.
And for you out there reading now. You who
still has those photos on your camera or your
laptop. You who goes to her MySpace page to
see what she's up to. You who has a box of
letters in your desk from her swearing
undying love.
This is for you, dude. It's time to move on
and enjoy the women of the world again.
I'll make this quick and painless, like
ripping off a band-aid.
1) Get rid of ALL photos and letters. I don't
mean you have to have some kind of voodoo
ritual where you set them on fire, but get
them out of your hands. Give them to a buddy
for safekeeping. Move them out of state. Bury
them away. The more iconic stuff you have to
remind you of her, the more you'll replay it,
and the harder it is to let go.
2) Delete her phone number, address and info
from your cell. No, you do not need to keep
it around just in case. She's not your
responsibility. Lose contact with her.
3) Start going to entirely new places. If you
lived in the same neighborhood as she did,
move. If you work at the same job, quit and
get a new job. Hell, if you can, move to a
brand-new city. Locations have ghosts, and
tough breakups create them. Go to a place you
can start over and re-create yourself. It's
good for the soul.
4) Change your look. While we're talking
re-invention, steal this trick from the
girl's playbook. After a breakup, go and get
yourself looking good. Hit the gym hard (I
always liked to lift to Metallica to get the
anger out). Get a cool haircut (at a real
salon, not Supercuts). Buy new clothes that
fit right. Make yourself look better, NOT for
her, but for you.
5) Go out with your friends. Your real
friends. Guys, girls, doesn't matter. Just
keep yourself social and busy. Don't follow
that instinct to hide away from the world and
re-gather. You need your tribe around you to
keep you going. It's OK to need people. Only
sociopaths and religious mystics do
everything alone, and neither of those groups
of guys does very well with the ladies.
Finally, big step 6!
This is the tricky one.
You have to get out there and flirt every
single day. Yes, you, yes, every day. In
order to get your confidence back up, you
need positive experience that reminds you
that you can do this.
There is is, man. It's never an easy thing to
get through a breakup, but just like anything
else, with help and guidance from guys with
experience, you can do it.
Phil, I'm here for you. This is why I started
this company. We're here to make sure that
YOU find the happiness with women you really
deserve. You've already had too much of the
suffering. Time for the good part.
Start getting it today.
Your friend,
Lance Mason
P.S. To make sure you get great girlfriends
starting NOW, I'm giving you my Surefire
Attraction Secrets 4-CD training program for
no money:
http://www.PickUp101.com/SurefireAttractionSecrets
P.P.S. You really want to know how to make a
relationship work? You need to know how
Rapport really works. Join us this month for
an exclusive Art of Rapport and Daygame:
http://www.PickUp101.com/Daygame
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